amw (amw) wrote,
amw
amw

  • Mood:
  • Music:

when even breathing feels like too much effort

I've got all this shit to write and the only place i can do it is in my paper journals. It's been a while since i was so depressed i didn't even have the motivation to get out of bed. I fought myself for a few hours and finally pulled myself up in time for the late class where i let some anger out. J was waiting when i got home and told me her grandma was about to pass away. So that fucking rocked. I've had to be strong for her all afternoon, all evening. She's flying to Montreal tomorrow. I'm just hoping my own shit will stay together after she leaves so i can do the work i need to do. Thank fuck i get to drum tomorrow night. I'd talk about the gig yesterday if it wouldn't break me apart again. It was spectacular, though, really beautiful. I cried.
Tags: crazy, looking back
Subscribe

  • Also, the trans community isn't bullshit.

    I mean, we're not a monolith. There are left wing trans people and right wing trans people and activist trans people and politically disinterested…

  • i was doing so well

    It's been a few weeks since i drank more than one or two beers. Like, that's how i control it, i only buy one or two, and then i only drink one or…

  • the trans community is bullshit

    Except... it isn't quite bullshit. I am done being trans. Being trans was so fucking 20 years ago. I decided i wanted to be a girl, i did my…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 2 comments