curiousIt never really occurred to me that my HRT could be affecting my mental health. I mean, logically, sure, but i guess i figured this is the same pill millions of women take every day for birth control so how bad can it be? It seems the millions of women are actually taking a different pill. I can't remember when or why i started on Diane 35. I think i was on Yasmin for a while before that. And Microgynon at the start. They're all the same estrogen, but different progestogens. I don't know if switching to whatever the "standard" birth control pill is these days would provide enough HRT juice to keep my body free of osteoporosis, but i think it's something i should ask my doctor. There's no point continuing on this already high-risk pill just for continuity's sake when it could be part of the reason i'm feeling so shitty as well.
These are the times it would probably be useful to still have some connection with the transgender community. I doubt my primary care physician - who, incidentally, is still a resident - has much of an idea of how to handle HRT in post-operative transsexuals. He may also not have a lot of experience determining which birth control drugs are preferred for people with a susceptibility to depression. But he's all i've got, so i guess i should try.
I need to see him anyway because soon my psychiatrist is going back to Saudi Arabia. Once he leaves, my connection with the mental health center that handled pretty much all my care last year will be broken. The only way back in is through the emergency room. That's a little unnerving as it is, but it's also going to suck to lose him as an individual because he's by far the best psychiatrist i've ever had. Now i'm sliding all the way back to that wonderful 2009 state of trying to get referrals and going on waiting lists until someone can see me. It could take months, and J is more than a little worried. In reality all my psychiatric meds were prescribed by my family doctor for years, so it shouldn't be a problem, but still. It's nice to have a specialist to talk to every now and then.
So yeah. Time to visit my doctor. And he probably won't be free for the next couple months because that's just the way they roll in Canada. Joy.
