amw (amw) wrote,

  • Mood:

hell in a handbasket

Every now and then i abandon FiveThirtyEight, The Guardian and Colbert for my political news. The sheer schadenfreude of watching Red State shitting their collective pants, smh at Talking Points Memo's gleeful gossip and marveling at the bizarro world of the conspiratorial conservative blogs makes this perhaps the most entertaining election season i have ever lived through. I wish Andrew Sullivan was still blogging, though i guess he would have had a breakdown by now over the outrageous stupidity of the GOP clown car. At least W and Cheney were a known known like Anakin and Palpatine. This is just an epic clusterfuck of reality show television, super PACs and the sad American spiral down the drain already clogged in Europe by UKIP/FN/AfD. Except it's happening in a major party. At this point it seems unthinkable Hillary won't win it in a landslide. Then again, six months ago i thought the idiot reality show star was just running a joke campaign. So, you know. America, fuck yeah.

In other news. I called in sick on Monday because i didn't want to go to work. Then it turned out Tuesday i actually was legit sick. Sick of work? Who knows? I went into the office today feeling like shit. And picked up a beer at the subway station on the way home, missing the subway car as i stood in line, because fuck work. I really don't hate my job. It's a good job. I am respected and do great work there. But even when i wake up sober and happy and energetic (relatively, due to my flu) i still end the day exhausted and burnt out and desperately wanting to escape. I need to break out of this somehow. I keep thinking if i stay sober for a few days, or a week, it will happen. But i can't even seem to do that after heading into the office, even though when i am not working i have no problem at all staying sober. Vicious circle.

Anyway, i really wish Andrew Sullivan was still blogging. The other sites don't update often enough. But today, with the SCOTUS nom and the fallout from Super Tuesday II: Clown Car Boogaloo, the news is coming thick and fast enough i don't want to go to sleep. Every new story makes me simultaneously cringe and cackle. This is the most epic clusterfuck of all time. As much as i have given up on all my hopes and dreams, i still entertain some kind of notion of retiring in America as a vagabond, or a snowbird if nothing else. And then i look at this, and the glass half full part of me says just wait till all the old white guys die off, and the glass half empty says America will end up some kind of post-apocalyptic wasteland before i'm old enough to enjoy it. And i'm not sure whether to laugh or cry. Europe is in the midst of an anti-immigrant backlash too. The only minority i have been a member of for 30+ years of my life is immigrants. So fuck everywhere.
Tags: alcoholism, news, politics, sick

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