amw (amw) wrote,

Job Update

  • $31k dishwasher job with overly bureaucratic hiring procedures

  • $50k programming job in outer suburbs that would require buying a car to commute

Current Offers:
  • $27.5k part-time telecommuting job with old employer

  • $55k full-time telecommuting job with old employer

  • $44.5k programming job with Small Company "A"

Interview This Afternoon:
  • programming job with Large Multinational "B"

Hoping To Be Called Back:
  • programming job with Cool Start-Up Company "C"

  • programming job with Cool Open Source Company "D"

Fuck. I feel so snobby refusing a job for being "only" 40something when most people in the country are earning much less than that. If i was still trying to find a job - any job - in America i'd jump on that first opportunity, regardless of commute time or salary level. But now i'm not. I want a job where i'll feel valued. I didn't really feel valued in my last position, and it's only since i've left and been telecommuting casually for them that i think they've realized how much i was worth to them. But going back to my old employer makes me feel like my career is stuck and not moving forwards.

If i'm going to stay in IT i want my career to move forwards, not spin its wheels. On the other hand, if i want to get out of IT ASAP then it shouldn't really matter who's paying the bills or how much i'm being paid. Though if i wanted to get out of IT intelligently i would be angling for analyst/team lead/management positions, because that's people knowledge (not computer knowledge) and its transferable to other industries. Those positions mean i need to move my career forward. Alternatively i could work part-time and try do something else in the other half of my days. But how many part-time jobs are there out there for a part-time IT worker? Will people seriously take me on? I had enough trouble finding fucking full-time "unskilled" work, much less part-time. I'm "overqualified" for other industries. Becoming a pointy haired boss might be my only out. And you don't become a PHB by working for small companies that pay shit cash. There's no career advancement.

FUCK! And i guess the worst thing is i don't have the personality to just take the first job that comes along and continue looking for something else in the mean time. I just don't feel it's right to use someone like that. If i get a job i want to be able to really put my heart into it. I want to give my new employer at least a year of solid work. And i feel if i give someone a year of half-assed work because i'm really looking for something else ... that's just wrong. It makes me feel yicky. If i was a PHB i wouldn't want half-assed employees working for me.

I just want my beachside resort where i can sip cocktails and go sailing on my yacht and write tunes and write books or something. Is it really that much to ask for? ;-)
Tags: career, freedom

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