amw (amw) wrote,

  • Mood:
  • Music:

ooky belly

What a freakin day. This is the first day since last week where i haven't been horribly sick, but my stomach is still a knot. Every time i eat i feel sick, but i can't not eat either. At least the headaches are gone.

Today we finally submitted the stuff for the lawyer. There are 10 forms, 250 photos and over 100 pages of emails, boarding passes, flight itineraries, restaurant receipts, ticket stubs etc. If that doesn't prove the authenticity of our relationship they're on crack. I really hope the lawyer doesn't send it back to ask for 100 more pages of stuff (which we have, but we were going crazy just trying to catalog all of this so we stopped).

It's really, really hard trying to prove your relationship to a third party who knows nothing about you and who you know nothing about. In a way it's nice to investigate your relationship objectively, be like a detective going back through old stuff, but it also feels a bit invasive that we have to do it at all. It's overwhelming because you just amass so much shit these days - the internet saves everything. I can only imagine how hard it would've been if we'd been together longer.

I need to try step outside myself and figure out if it's weird to get married after knowing someone for 18 months and living with them for 12. I've heard of people getting married much quicker, but then i've been in two relationships both longer than this one which both obviously ended before marriage. I can see how that might come off looking opportunistic, objectively. On the other hand, i've never been in a relationship before where marriage was a legal option, so it's apples and oranges. What i can say - and what i tried to get across in all those immigration documents - is that after 6 months living with J i knew she was the person i wanted to spend the rest of my life with. She complements me so well, she can somehow deal with my stupid shit and be patient and supportive and loving and that hasn't changed in all the time we've been together. On April 3 we both vowed it wouldn't change "till death do us part" and imo that's all the proof immigration should need.

Earlier today i was going to get on here and write a whole post about how terrified i was that i was going to school for the first time in 12 years. I got my university degree by distance education, so this evening was going to be the first time since high school that i'd step into a classroom and have to interact with other students. As it turned out, the Starbucks i stopped at didn't have wi-fi, so i never got online and now i've gone to the class and things turned out fine so i don't have any neurotic ranting to do on that.
Tags: anxiety, immigration, sick

  • om break

    Lack of vaccinations aside, it's nice spending some time with a hippie. It's funny because i used to be a full out hippie in my late teenage years -…

  • the trans community is bullshit

    Except... it isn't quite bullshit. I am done being trans. Being trans was so fucking 20 years ago. I decided i wanted to be a girl, i did my…

  • proudly nothing

    Like a lot of us here on LiveJournal, i sometimes poke my head into our most famous English-language community ohnotheydidnt. I care…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.