And then this morning i didn't want to get out of bed. But i eventually did and i squashed my brain into work mode and did 3-4 hours solid work. Get completely consumed in coding a piece of software, that's how i managed to keep my shit together for years, right? What a fucking shitty way to do it. Now i am skipping another Friday night dinner because i am feeling too crappy to go. J was upset but i am already having a hard enough time knowing that tomorrow i have breakfast, lunch and dinner with yet more family i've never met who are in for the weekend from NYC.
I need to write more but it's hard to get my thoughts to stick, all i've got is emotions and even they aren't slowing down much.